How do you feel about being burned out? E111

September 19, 2023

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Today we talk about emotions. I ask you to answer the question: How do you feel about being burned out? Or how do you feel about another diagnosis or life-altering change in your life? And if you are honest with yourself, you probably feel negative emotions about it. And I tell you that this is a good thing. Find out why in this episode.

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The headline and question of this episode is: How do you feel about being burned out? Not, how do you feel about burnout? And I am not asking you how you feel in general while being burned out.

I am explicitly asking this question like this: How do you feel about being burned out?

Now, if you are not burned out, fantastic. I am so happy about every single person who can say wholeheartedly that they are not burned out in one or several areas of their life.

If you have a suspicion or you are already sure that you are burned out or have been in the past, then what I am going to share with you today is a fundamental part of your recovery and to leave burnout behind for good. And this applies to any other life-impacting events or diagnosis, not just burnout.

Acceptance is the first step in the healing process

Accepting something that has a life-altering impact, brings up high levels of emotions.

I remember sitting in the doctor’s office and it was the first time I said the words out loud: I think I am burned out. I immediately broke out in tears. The acceptance and the reality hit me in that moment and the emotions of it overwhelmed me.

And I want to share with you straight away: That is a good thing. Let them come up. Let them out. The worst thing you can do is to deny them like you might have denied yourself from accepting that you are burned out.

The emotions of this journey are part of it, so please let them be what they are and give them the space they deserve. And we will talk soon about how you can do that.

What we usually do with negative emotions

In episode 20, I go into detail on what we usually do when we are faced with strong emotions, especially when it’s the kind of emotions that we classify as negative and uncomfortable.

In a nutshell, we are trained and we learn to do all of this with negative emotions other than feeling them:

We ignore them
We numb them
We try to manage them away
We hide them from others
We redirect or channel them
We live in denial or mislabel them.

Listen to Episode 20 if you want to find out more about all these different techniques we learned to deal with those feelings.

We harm ourselves and others by not transmuting our emotions

All of these forms of dealing with our feelings work for a certain amount of time. Some just work for a few minutes or hours until the emotions come back. Some can work for years and decades.

In the end, we are harming ourselves through the denial of those feelings because we are not dealing with them or living through them.

And that is absolutely normal because we have never learned how to. We have all been taught these other coping mechanisms because it’s easier and less painful in the short run. But if you think about it, we create so much more pain in the long run.

Another way of dealing with emotions is to express them to others. To let them out on the people in our lives. But sadly that is creating more harm than the other coping mechanisms.

Expressing your emotions to others, the wrong way

Expressing the emotions onto another person is not releasing the emotion in the way we want to. So it’s not resolving the emotion being inside of us AND it usually hurts the other person and your relationship with them.

Examples of this are that:

Anger turns into aggression

Insecurity turns into Control

Dislike can turn into Hatred

Frustration can turn into Rage

Do you see that the initial emotion is more internal and the second one is the more external version of the first one?

The problem with doing it to another person is that you will create other emotions afterwards like guilt, shame, or disgust. All due to you acting out your emotions onto another person.

How do we transmute our emotions healthily?

So what is the solution then, what can we do now to start releasing and transmuting the emotions inside of us in a more healthy manner?

To accept and acknowledge an emotion to give it space and attention. You can sit with the emotion and let it happen. This might sound a bit weird and might not work straight away. But you get better at it with practice.

Next time you experience a negative emotion and you have the chance, take yourself out of the situation, go into a room where you can be alone and sit down and let the emotion happen inside of you.

And that could even mean crying, your body might shake from the energy of the emotion, or you might want to yell. Everything is ok and helps the emotion to finally get its chance to be what it is and then transfer into a new state of energy.

Just be with the emotion – nothing else is needed

Don’t try to make it bigger than it is, don’t try to analyse it – let it be, let it flow through your body and just be with the emotion. Feel that energy in your body moving.

A good idea is to actively breathe through the feeling of the emotion. Breathing consciously will help the emotion to not be too overwhelming and help it to pass through you.

Focusing on the breath while processing the emotion, helps you to not get lost in the emotion and the thinking about the emotion. It keeps you in the present moment instead of sinking into the scenarios of what caused the emotion to begin with. That’s not what it’s about. It’s about feeling the emotion.

Apply this now to your life with burnout or any other diagnosis

So coming back to my initial question: How do you feel about being burned out? The reason why I shared all of this with you is that we can face many different unwanted emotions when we are faced with a life-altering diagnosis like burnout.

And these emotions are part of the recovery journey. Many shy away from them and that means not fully accepting that you are burned out. That is one way to hide from those feelings.

Another way is to use those coping mechanisms that we reviewed. And even if that means that you fully accept being burned out, you are missing a significant part of that recovery journey that is so instrumental to overcoming burnout once and for all.

You can do it! In the end, it’s your choice

I know this can all sound a bit scary and deep. And yes, this is deep work. But the choice is yours: Are you willing to learn how to process your emotions or do you want to keep living with the consequence of not being able to overcome burnout or any other diagnosis that you face?

From my own experience, I can tell you that it’s worth it. It will not only help you to overcome what you currently want to overcome or resolve in your life. It will help you to become a more whole person. You will realize that parts of you were missing before and now you finally start to integrate those and feel more like yourself.

Two easy ways to show your appreciation!

If you found value in today’s episode, here’s what you can do to show your support:

First, consider making a donation to the podcast. Every little bit helps to cover the costs of producing and hosting the show. And ensures that I can continue to bring you the latest insights and opinions on the topic of energy and improving your life.

Second, leave a rating and review on Apple Podcasts. This helps boost the podcast’s visibility and attract new listeners, which helps me create more tailored content for you to enjoy.

So whether you choose to donate, leave a rating and review, or both, know that you’re an integral part of my vision. You are helping everyone who struggles with burnout or high-stress levels to experience how awesome their life can be. So, thank you for your support!